Through Enemy Eyes

Welcome to the third of twelve short stories.  For those who don’t know, this year my New Years resolution was to write twelve short stories, one each month, then post the story on my blog on the last Wednesday of the month.  So with that being said, enjoy!

 

 

The projectile hurtled toward him with fatal speed, filling the air with an eerie whistling.

A second later a scorching blast of heat sent him flying. The world rumbled and roared, shades of brown spinning around his head. He hit the floor hard, rolling end over end until he found himself flat on his back. With a groan, he managed to glance at the entrance. It was now blocked by fallen rock.

Fuck, Sherman Morris thought to himself.

After catching his breath he picked himself up off the rocky ground and dusted off his dark brown jacket. Taking stock of the situation, he knew it wasn’t good. Even just looking at the rubble told him he wouldn’t be able to clear it with his bare hands.

“Oh, you’re still alive,” a flat voice said.

Sherman turned in the direction of the voice. Leaning against one of the metal arches that held up the tunnel was an older man who looked to be in his forties. He was plainly dressed: a ragged brown jacket covered a old gray shirt and faded blue pants. He had bright green eyes, brown hair, and a thin beard coated in dust. His lips were dry and chapped. He held a hand against his chest, holding in the blood from where he’d been shot. An ugly scar marred the back of his wrist, traces of an ancient wound.

By contrast, Sherman was young, in his late twenties. He had dark brown eyes, reddish hair that had been combed back, and a round, clean-shaven face. Underneath his jacket was a military uniform, desert camouflage. On his back he carried a small black assault rifle and a green pack. He raised a hand to his neck and fidgeted with the silver cross that hung there at all times.

“You gonna do something? Or are you just gonna sit there and stare at me all day,” the older man asked.

Sherman didn’t reply. As he walked toward the man, his black military boots clicking against the ground, he took in their surroundings.

They had taken shelter in an old, abandoned mine. To their left, the tunnel ended in a solid rock wall that had been carved out and completely stripped of pyronium. To their right, the tunnel led to an old elevator shaft which took people deeper into the mine. From the looks of things, the elevator was no longer powered. But that didn’t matter. The only way in and out of the mine was now blocked.

After a moment he knelt down next to the man, laying his assault rifle and pack against the wall.

“I need to take a look at your wound,” he said.

The older man took his hand away with a grimace. The wound didn’t look that large but it was bleeding quite a bit, which meant that the bullet had probably nicked an artery.

“Let me look at your back,” Sherman said as he pulled the man forward. “Shit,” he muttered after a moment. “No exit wound.”

The man coughed as he leaned back against the metal arch. “Well that’s just great.”

“That means the bullet’s still inside you and we need to get it out as soon as possible,” Sherman explained.

“No fuckin’ shit,” the man replied. There was a brief silence. “Well? Are you gonna dig it out or just let it rattle around in there?”

Sherman looked around. He noticed the faint light glinting off of something near the old elevator. When he walked closer he found an old, rusted workbench with a gray toolbox sitting on top. Dust flew off the latch as Sherman popped the box open, making him cough. He didn’t see anything of use at first: just a plasma torch, a couple of screwdrivers, and some gel for making explosives. But then his eyes landed on a miniature, dusty pair of pliers. Sherman snatched them up and made his way back down the tunnel.

The man gazed at the pliers and gave him a doubtful look. Sherman grabbed the canteen hanging off the side of his pack, unscrewed the lid, and doused the end of the pliers with water.

“Really? You think that’s going to sanitize it?”

“Would you rather I stick a pair of dusty old pliers in your gut,” Sherman asked. The man fell silent, looking down at his chest and groaning. Sherman dried the pliers off on his jacket.

“This is gonna hurt,” he said, looking the man in the eyes.

“Just do it already.”

From the moment he dug the pliers in, the man’s pained howls rang in his ears. It was difficult finding the bullet. The pliers slid around, making sickening squelching noises as it went. An eternity passed before he managed to get a grip on the bullet. Once he did, Sherman pulled the pliers out as fast as he could. A hunk of crumpled brass, stained with crimson blood, glistened on the end. He pulled it off and tossed it aside. It clinked against the rocky floor as it rolled into the darkness.

“Argh…fuck,” the man cursed. “You couldn’t have made that a little less painful?”

“Would it kill you to have some gratitude,” Sherman asked, irritated.

“Ha! If only.”

Outside, the desert winds howled. Sherman cast his eyes up above and saw cracks in the rock where sunlight peered in. It was still around late morning from what he could tell. Although because of Otho’s orbit days were shorter than on Earth, which meant that nighttime was only a few hours away.

“Why were they shooting at you,” he asked.

“Why do you think?”

“I can’t believe Otho Prima would try to kill one of their own.”

The man turned his head toward Sherman, a stern look in his eyes.

“Are you really that goddamn naive? Of course Otho Prima would kill one of their own. They’ve been doing it since the beginning. Anyone who tries to defect?” He put his fingers to his head and mimed a gunshot. “Boom. Dead.”

“But you weren’t trying to defect. We captured you.”

“And how are they supposed to know I won’t give up information?”

He has a point, Sherman admitted to himself. The man had stabilized a little bit, although his face was still pallid and sweaty. His breathing was heavy and his hand was firmly clasped to his chest. After a moment, Sherman took off his jacket.

“Here,” he said, offering it to the man. “Use this to help stop the bleeding.”

The man hesitated, but eventually took the clothing and tucked it under his arm. He looked up at Sherman.

“Thanks kid,” he said.

With his jacket off, the silver cross around Sherman’s neck was on full display. The man’s eyes flicked to it and he nodded.

“You a believer?”

“Born and raised,” Sherman replied, feeling a swelling of pride.

“That’s good for you,” the man responded, his voice flat. He turned his attention away from the cross and stared at the cave-in. Sherman studied him for a moment.

“You used to believe, didn’t you?”

“I did,” the man replied. “Once upon a time.”

“And now?”

“Let’s just say that if God exists he’s an asshole and I want nothing to do with him.”

 

After a long time the wind died down. The sun sat high in the sky, shafts of light spilling in from the cracks in the rocks.

The man hadn’t said anything for over an hour. He leaned back against the wall in silence, applying pressure to his wound with the jacket. His green eyes never wandered. They stared straight ahead, dull and distant.

Sherman tried using his radio to call for help but got nothing aside from static. He figured it had either been damaged in the blast or the rocks were blocking the signal. The gel he found might be able to blow open a hole big enough to escape, but he lacked the other materials necessary to make an explosive.

No…they were stuck here for the time being.

“What’s your name,” Sherman asked.

The man didn’t move or reply.

“I’m Sherman. Sherman Morris.”

No response. He sighed.

“Look, we’re gonna be here for a while,” he said. “Might as well get to know each other. All I have is your code name: Ares.”

The man laughed.

“The Greek god of war,” he said. “The OP certainly have a flair for the dramatic.”

“How does someone like you end up with them,” Sherman asked. “You don’t seem like the type.”

“And what type would that be,” the man asked, turning and giving him a hard look.

“Well…you know…a-“

“Fanatic? Anarchist? Terrorist?”

Sherman didn’t reply. The man scoffed.

“Figures. I know your type: naive, full of ideas about duty and patriotism. Let me guess…you saw those holoboards every day you went to school, their screens chock full of glowing images of Earth and people in uniform. ‘Join today,’ they said. ‘Help protect humanity’. And then when you graduated you strolled into the recruitment office believing every word.”

“So you used to live on Earth then,” Sherman said, ignoring the man’s snide comments.

“Ha…well you’re persistent, I’ll give you that.”

The man turned and looked him over. For a moment, Sherman thought he saw a glimmer of respect in those old, hardened eyes.

“The name’s Weston…Weston Harper.”

“Nice to meet you Weston.”

“We’re sitting in an old, caved-in mine. I’ve been shot and I’m slowly bleeding out. There’s no rescue coming in the foreseeable future…I’d hardly call this ‘nice’.”

Sherman thought he heard a brief rustling outside and snapped his head up, military instinct going wild. But it was just the wind. During the silence that followed, his eyes were drawn to the scar on the back of Weston’s hand.

“How’d that happen,” he asked, pointing to it.

“What, this old thing,” Weston asked, lifting his hand up. “Factory accident…long time ago. Back on Earth I used to help make spaceship parts for military and commercial use. Or I guess I should say that I oversaw the robots that did most of the work. I only got my hands dirty if something went wrong.”

“From your scar, I’m guessing that something went wrong.”

“Nice work detective,” Weston remarked in a mocking tone. “But yes, one day one of the robots on the line malfunctioned and couldn’t shut off its plasma torch. So I went down there to take a look. But when I got close the robot suddenly whirled around toward me. I threw up my hands to shield my face and the torch caught the back of my wrist. I don’t know if you’ve ever been burned by a plasma torch, but it’s not pretty. It can tear right through your flesh and down to the bone. Fortunately it only lasted for a second or two before someone managed to pull the breaker and shut everything down.” He looked down at the scar. “But it was enough.”

“So…did you quit after that,” Sherman asked.

“Hell no. I loved that job,” he replied.

“Then how did you end up here?”

Weston sighed.

“Not by choice kid. I think it was about three or four years after the accident. There was this bunch of corporate shakeups…companies merging…acquiring each other…that kind of thing. Powerful people playing powerful games. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my life, it’s that when powerful people play games the people in the middle? Saps like you and me? We’re the ones that get screwed.”

“The factory closed down and you were laid off.”

“Bingo. Automation was getting better and better and they needed less and less people. Our factory was just one of the casualties that year.”

“Couldn’t you just find another job,” Sherman asked.

“You think I didn’t try? I scouted month after month for almost a year, but nothing permanent ever turned up. Thank god for temporary work.”

Weston sighed again.

“My wife, Sonja…she kept telling me it would be fine, that I would find something eventually. But even she had doubts. I could see it in her eyes…her lovely blue eyes…”

Weston’s eyes glazed over and he trailed off.

“How did you end up on Otho,” Sherman asked.

“I had been through so many help ads and other bullshit…I even tried writing my Statesman but you know how politicians are. They don’t even bother to send back a real letter…just some uniform shit thanking you for writing in. I heard about Otho shortly after the huge pyronium discovery.”

“When they broke into that massive, natural cavern?”

“That’s the one.”

“Man…that was over ten years ago. I remember hearing about it when I was still in high school. People were excited.”

“And why wouldn’t they be? More pyronium meant more jobs, more money, and more power for spaceships and other technology those rich, well-off schlubs depended on. It took some time to convince Sonja, but eventually she saw that it was in the best interest for both her and Benny.”

“Benny?”

“Yeah my son, Benny. Such a hyperactive boy, but then again who isn’t when they’re a kid?”

“Yeah,” Sherman agreed with a laugh.

“So we made our way out here,” Weston continued. “Bought a house in a small, developing town and I got to work in the mines. It was good money for a while.”

“Why do I sense a ‘but’ coming?”

“Because all good things must come to an end. It’s funny…I left Earth to get away from all the political bullshit.”

Weston’s eyes went dark.

“But eventually, I found myself drowning in it.”

 

The day was late. The sun had slunk down to the other side of the sky and shafts of light no longer streamed in to their underground prison. Sherman took his eyes away from the rocky ceiling and turned them back on Weston. It was obvious the fever was getting worse, but with no medical supplies there was little Sherman could do to alleviate the pain.

He tried the radio every half hour but it refused to work. They would just have to wait for someone to come looking.

“Do you remember when the revolts started,” Sherman asked.

“Of course I do. I was living here after all.”

“What happened? What started it?”

Weston let out a short laugh.

“Tryin’ to keep me talking, eh kid? Okay…I’ll play along,” he said with a groan as he shifted position. “It all started with the taxes.”

“The import taxes?”

“Yep. Earth started taxing anything the colonists tried to bring in. Which was a problem because they depended on those imports to survive. The massive surge of people moving in after that pyronium find meant that the planet’s food and water supply just couldn’t keep up.”

“Why did the government start taxing you?”

“They thought we were getting too rich off the pyronium mining. We weren’t, but who’s going to tell ’em any different? They saw an opportunity to make money, and the people of Earth were more than happy to gobble up the story about well-off Othians making the big bucks.”

“But I’ve heard there’s a lot of money in pyronium.”

“Oh there is, but we hardly got any of it. No…the corporations saw to that. They squeezed us out of every damn nickel and dime they possibly could. Before long most of us were barely making enough to get by. If it wasn’t for some enterprising Othians streamlining our insulated greenhouses with genetically modified crops, we’d all either be bankrupt or starving.”

Weston shifted position with a pained groan.

“But yeah, it started with the taxes. And they kept getting worse and worse. It was really only a matter of time before the pirates came about.”

“I’ve read about them,” Sherman said. “They would attack cargo ships and steal their contents, then sell it to the colonists at a reduced price.”

“Yeah it all sounded great…until you realized it was a scam. The prices the pirates were selling stuff at…it was the difference between paying ninety-five cents instead of a dollar. But it was all we had. And our collusion with the pirates made Earth angry.”

“So they sent in the military.”

“Oh yeah they did…and they swarmed the planet looking for the pirates. They assaulted people, stormed houses and businesses…anything to get the information they wanted. These were the kind of guys who could make children cry and not give a fuck.”

“But there are rules barring the mistreatment of children and non-combatants.”

“Were you here kid? No, you weren’t. Don’t talk about things you don’t understand.”

“But-“

“But nothing. All the way out here? Those rules mean very little. I remember those days…they came up to me at work several times demanding information. And every time, I had nothing to give them. But to the EM, we were all potential suspects. One of them actually rifle-butted me in the eye once. Stung for a week.”

“Did you file a complaint?”

“With who? The Earth government didn’t give a damn. In their eyes we were all in bed with terrorists. No…it was better to just keep your head down and stay out of the way. Eventually the military tracked the pirates to an old, abandoned asteroid mining facility they’d re-purposed.”

“I remember seeing the news reports. The pirates fired upon the military, forcing them to shoot back. Eventually the facility was destroyed by all the fighting,” Sherman said.

“Wow…people really swallowed the pill on that one didn’t they?”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh the pirates fired on them all right. But that was only after the nuke was launched.”

“Wait…they nuked the place?” Sherman was in disbelief. “No way.”

“Oh they nuked it all right…blasted that fucker into stardust. Then they suppressed all knowledge of the incident and Earth was none the wiser. If anyone ever tried to pry into it, they cited security concerns and kept the information confidential. That’s the government for you…miles of red tape.”

“But what about the Liberation Party,” Sherman asked. “They helped with the pirates right?”

“That part was true,” Weston confirmed. “They were the ones that supplied the military with the location of the pirate base.”

“Who were they?”

“Just a band of determined colonists who believed that a free Otho, existing in peaceful cooperation with Earth, was the only way to go. In exchange for the information on the pirates’ location they were promised that Otho would be free to do as it wished. It was only later they found out it was all bullshit.”

“That was when they instituted martial law, wasn’t it?”

“Yes sir,” Weston said. “The military took over running the government because supposedly we were too dangerous to rule ourselves.”

“That pissed a lot of people off I imagine,” Sherman said.

“Hell yeah it did. There were protests in the streets almost every day, some of them even escalating into riots.”

“Did you join them?”

“I thought about it. But then the Woodhurst Massacre happened.”

“Oh god.”

“Yeah. The military and protesters met in the town square of Woodhurst and traded words. Eventually someone threw a stone or fired a shot…no one knows for sure. But everything went to shit. Once the gunfire and smoke had cleared, over three dozen people were dead.”

“Jesus,” Sherman said, fiddling with the cross on his neck.

“You know, my wife made me something like that once.”

“Hmm? You mean this cross?”

“Yeah…one of her hobbies. Back on Earth she loved making jewelry. One day I came home from the factory and she presented me with this golden cross covered in tiny red gemstones…beautiful little thing. She told me she’d spent weeks perfecting it. Of course it wasn’t really gold but you’d be hard-pressed to tell the difference.”

“Where is it now?”

“Oh…I lost it a long time ago,” he said, averting his eyes. Sherman could tell there was more to the story, but decided not to push it.

“Anyways…where was I,” Weston asked.

“You had just finished talking about Woodhurst.”

“Oh yeah yeah…well after Woodhurst the Liberation Party sent out a call for peace talks with the Earth government. From my understanding they demanded that Otho be a free colony. Otherwise, they argued, something like this was bound to happen again. And Earth, still reeling from the disaster, was forced to agree. So the Liberation Party was placed into power and they did their best to ensure that Otho was treated fairly and respectfully.”

“Sounds like a golden age,” Sherman said.

“It kinda was,” Weston agreed. “Things were good for a while. People had money in their pockets. We had food and water and all sorts of stuff. Everyone was happy.”

“So what happened? Where is the Liberation Party now?”

“Oh they’re still in power,” he said. “Although their name has changed along with their tactics.”

It took a moment to hit Sherman. But when it did, his mind reeled.

“No way,” he exclaimed. “No fucking way.”

“Yep,” Weston said, looking Sherman right in the eye. “The Liberation Party and Otho Prima? One and the same.”

“But why…how? How does a group of concerned citizens transform into a bunch of-“

“Crazed fanatics? Dictators?”

“Well I wasn’t going to say that.”

“Yeah you were,” Weston said. “And you’d be absolutely right. They’re a bunch of crazed totalitarian shitheads.”

“What changed?”

“You know that old saying, the one about the corruption of absolute power?” Sherman nodded. “Well that’s exactly what happened. They got a taste of it and liked it so much they kept going and going. And then one day they woke up, looked in the mirror, and realized it was too late to turn back.”

 

The sun fell below the horizon and darkness reigned supreme. The land was permeated by the shadow of night.

Sherman fired up two large, blue glow sticks, clipping one to his belt and setting the other one on the ground nearby. Even under the surreal blue light Sherman could tell Weston was still pallid and weak. Each breath came as a struggle, quivering and raw.

Digging into his pack, Sherman found a blanket and draped it over him as best he could. Weston took hold of the blanket and nodded.

“Why did you join,” Sherman asked.

“Join what?”

“Otho Prima.”

Weston didn’t reply. Instead he lifted his quaking eyes toward the ceiling, as if trying to find any trace of the stars. But the tiny cracks in the rock walls weren’t enough to allow a glimpse of the cosmos.

“Weston?” No answer. “Why did you join?”

“Being a parent is tough, you know?”

Sherman blinked.

“I know,” he admitted. “I have a wife and a two-year-old back home.”

“Let me tell you, it never gets easier…just different. But despite that, I could never do anything but love Benny. One year, for his birthday, we decided to surprise him with this new virtual reality video game thing he’d been wanting. It took six months of saving money from the mines, but it was worth it…just to see his face light up after he tore off the wrapping paper. And man…you should’ve seen him…he’s thanking me and Sonja and giving us kisses and just bouncin’ up and down right there in the kitchen…”

Weston paused and laughed, wiping away a tear.

“So anyways, he takes the thing and he’s running upstairs to play it. We expected him to come asking us for help setting it up, but no…does it all by himself. That’s the thing with kids, you know? They’re way more clever than you’ll ever give ’em credit for.”

Sherman had to chuckle. But then the smile faded from Weston’s face.

“About three hours later, there’s a knock at the door. Sonja goes to open it. And suddenly, there’s five armed soldiers storming into the house. One of them shoves Sonja aside so hard she falls to the floor. I jump up from my chair, ready to fight but another shoves his rifle into my gut, knocking the wind out of me.”

“They were Earth Military, weren’t they?”

“Yes sir, Earth’s proudest and finest,” Weston snarled, his voice full of sarcastic venom. “So while three of them are keeping me and Sonja under control, the other two are ransacking the place. The man in charge, some jackass named Griffin, explains that they heard we were housing spies for Otho Prima. We weren’t of course, but try telling them that.”

Weston paused. His eyes were far away…lost in time.

“I notice one of them heading up the stairs. Of course my first thought is of my son, who probably has no idea what’s going on because of that headset he’s wearing. I jump up from my seat, startling the three men around us. ‘Don’t hurt him, don’t hurt him’, I start begging, practically tearing up in front of ’em. Griffin, the commander, just cocks his head and stares at me. By the time he realizes what’s going on, it’s too late. His man has entered my son’s room and the next thing we hear is yelling and a loud crash.”

“I knew before I even heard the crying,” Weston continued. “They had broken his new favorite toy. They had destroyed the birthday present we had given to him just hours before. All that toiling in the mines…wasted because of one moment and one jackass.”

Weston paused before he continued, taking a deep, shaky breath.

“They left after that. Griffin, for as much of an asshole as he was, actually reprimands the guy who broke my son’s video game. But when I tell him I’m going to file a complaint with the government he gives me this look that says ‘try me’. He and I both knew nothing would come of it, that no one would take my word over his. So they leave in their shuttle, probably to go back to their cushy little lives. Meanwhile Sonja trudges up to Benny’s room and sits there comforting him. Later, when she comes back down, she tells me he cried himself to sleep…poor kid. No twelve year-old deserves that.”

Sherman nodded in agreement. Suddenly, Weston’s voice dropped to a sinister monotone.

“Hour and a half later, someone else breaks down the door…Otho Prima. They demand to know what we told the EM. ‘Nothing you assholes,’ I yell at them. And it’s the truth. But they keep demanding answers. And when I keep refusing, the man in charge points to one of the soldiers and motions him upstairs.”

“Stop.”

“And this solider…oh he rushes up the stairs with this demented excitement in his eyes…”

“Stop.”

“He jogs down the hallway, right up to my son’s door. He’s about to enter when the commander orders him to stop. The commander turns, looks me right in the eye, and tells me it’s my last chance. And I’m sitting there, begging and pleading, screaming over and over again that we told them nothing…that we know nothing….”

Stop!

Why?!” Weston’s eyes snapped toward Sherman, full of fiery malice. “Why do you want me to stop?! Because you know exactly what happened don’t you kid?! Because you and that piece of shit fraternity you call a military know the lengths the OP go to curb resistance and you don’t do a fucking thing about it!

Sherman averted his eyes. He had nothing to say. How could he? Of course he knew about it. It was common knowledge. It was even part of the propaganda the military used to recruit people.

Weston scoffed. “You’re all so damn blind. It’s just black and white to you, good and evil. You don’t see the people caught in between, the people who suffer because you can’t see beyond your pointless ideology.”

Sherman summoned the courage to lift his head up. But Weston was no longer looking at him. Instead he was staring off into space…his eyes shaking and his lips quivering. He’s reliving the pain of that night, Sherman thought, over and over again like his own personal nightmare.

Weston took a deep breath and managed to calm himself.

“One tiny ‘POP’, and we know it’s done. He’s gone…Benny’s gone…forever.” He turned and looked at Sherman. “I didn’t get angry. I didn’t lash out. I just…sat there…my entire body numb. Have you ever felt anything like that?”

Sherman shook his head.

“It’s the craziest thing. Your arms and legs turn to jelly. Your body feels like it weighs ten times what it should. It’s like you’re…drained…like every bit of energy has been taken from you…”

Weston bit his lip before he continued.

“Sonja, on the other hand, gets fuckin’ pissed. She stands up and takes a swing at one of the soldiers, screaming ‘you killed my boy, you killed my boy!’ Two of them level their guns on her, ready to fire. And they would have. They would have shot her right there in cold blood. But I begged them to stop, told them I would do anything.”

Weston sighed.

“I promised I would fight for the OP. One week later, I was shipping off to an OP boot camp.”

Outside, the wind picked up for a brief moment, an eerie howl sweeping across the desert like distant crying.

“That’s why you joined,” Sherman said, his voice barely audible. “You’re fighting to keep your wife alive.”

“Sonja?” Weston chuckled. “No…they put a bullet in her head ten minutes after I shipped out.”

Sherman’s eyes went wide.

“But…but why?”

“They couldn’t take the chance that she would seek revenge. They saw how fired up she was, how willing she was to take them on. They saw the anger in her eyes, so they killed her. I found out from one of my squadmates three months later. He overhead a conversation between two commanding officers. And that was it. I had nothing left.”

Neither of them spoke for a long time. The only sound was the keening wind whirling through the landscape. Sherman felt like a stone had sunk in his chest. He stared at the ground, playing with the silver cross around his neck.

He heard Weston laugh.

“What’s so funny,” he asked, raising his head.

“Oh nothing…it’s just…you remind me of me back in the day, back when I still had that golden cross. I was always fidgeting with it…couldn’t keep my hands off the damn thing.”

“What really happened to it? You didn’t just lose it.”

“After Benny died I kept it in the front pocket of my jacket, right next to my heart. Then the night I learned about Sonja’s death, I hurled the damn thing as hard as I could into the desert.”

Weston’s voice grew somber.

“I bet it will still be rotting out there long after I’m dead…long after we’ve all turned to dust…”

 

It was the dead of night…no wind or light. The world was silent.

Weston grew worse and worse as time went on. His face was white and his hands wouldn’t stop shaking. Sherman could tell he was having trouble keeping his eyes open.

“Hey,” he said, shaking him. “You have to stay awake.”

“Urgh…I’ve been awake for so long. Isn’t it about time I got to sleep?”

“Why did you stay with Otho Prima,” Sherman asked. “After what they did to you it’s not like you owe them any favors. You could have gone to the Earth Military and fought back.”

“Oh wouldn’t that be grand,” Weston replied sarcastically. “Become the glorious hero of the Othians, beat back the tyranny of Otho Prima. Maybe I’d even get a medal.” He scoffed. “Then I’d be forgotten, left to wallow in misery, my wife and kid gone. It doesn’t matter. None of it fuckin’ matters.”

“So why did you stay?”

“I guess,” Weston said, “I figured it would be an easy way to die.”

Sherman felt a lump in his throat and averted his eyes.

“I was too much of a coward to do it myself so I figured that if I marched headlong into battle, eventually I’d catch a bullet or two,” Weston continued, not paying Sherman any notice. “But it never happened. Victory after victory passed and I kept getting promoted. Eventually I made it all the way up to commander. Funny, isn’t it? I was the same rank as the man who ordered my son’s death.”

“What happened to him,” Sherman asked.

“The OP commander? Heard he got caught in a grenade blast. Died choking on his own blood after hours of suffering.” Weston shrugged. “Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving prick.”

And in his heart, Sherman found that he couldn’t agree more.

“So I kept fighting and fighting, hoping somewhere deep inside that my next fight would be my last.”

“You were hoping to die so that you could rejoin your family,” Sherman mused.

Weston just laughed, a choking and sputtering sound.

“Don’t be ridiculous Sherman,” he said. “I’ve stopped believing in an afterlife. I just want everything to be done. I’m tired…so damn tired.”

And in the darkness, Sherman couldn’t help but smile.

“What are you so happy about,” Weston asked.

“You just called me ‘Sherman’.”

“Well, don’t get used to it kid,” he replied. But Sherman could tell he was smiling too.

 

Hours passed. Light began to rise, a faint pinprick of orange appearing through the rocky cracks.

“Weston, the sun is rising,” Sherman said.

“The sun always rises,” he grumbled.

“Someone will come soon. Hang in there. You can make it.”

“Why? Why would I want to? I’ve lost everything. The only person I have left is my mother, and she’s in a home riddled with dementia.”

Silence fell over them for a long time. Sherman watched as the sun kept rising, the light growing brighter. But it was hard for him to feel good about it. For as the sun rose higher and higher, Weston’s head sunk lower and lower into his chest. The color drained from his face as if the sun was leeching the life out of him.

Sherman shook him awake a few times, but his heart was no longer in it. He had come to Otho on a mission to capture and extract a high value target known only by the code name “Ares”. Ares…god of war…god of the violent and untamed. It seemed fitting for a man who had won victory after military victory by sheer force of will and blitz tactics. But underneath the ominous name was just a man…a sad, broken man.

“Weston, come on, stay awake. They’ll find us soon.”

Weston uttered a weak, coughing laugh.

“You’re an optimist kid…I like that.” Then he sighed. “Goddamn, you should be at home, taking care of your wife and kid…not trudging through the sand on this assfuck of a planet.”

His breathing was slow and erratic. Sherman knew he didn’t have long left.

“What about your mother,” he asked. “What is she going to do once you’re gone?”

“My mother usually thinks I’m her long dead husband, and that’s on a good day.”

“But don’t you want to visit her one last time?”

Weston managed a faint smile.

“And how would I do that kid?”

“I can take you there,” Sherman said. “I can bring you in and let you see her one last time.”

“That’s nice of you…but I’ll pass. The last message I received from the home said that the cancer was spreading faster than expected. They estimated she had at most two weeks left. No…I’d rather have my memories. She was a strong woman…my mother. She didn’t take shit from anybody. I’d rather remember her like that than as a skeleton wrapped up in a hospital blanket.”

They passed the time in silence. The sun continued its glorious ascension, warm light spilling in through the cracks. But Weston continued to fade.

Sherman started to think he was gone when suddenly he spoke up.

“Hey…Sherman?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re a good kid. Never forget that. Never stop being good…”

And suddenly, the sunlight was shining on one half of Weston’s face, leaving the other wrapped in darkness. Sherman was transfixed, his eyes locked on the seemingly impossible balance of light and shadow.

The light of lights looks always on the motive, not the deed…

An old saying…Sherman couldn’t remember where he had heard it. Some old poet maybe, from more romantic times when life could be summed up in colorful prose. A distant time, when things were simpler.

But nothing was ever simple. Sherman understood that now.

Just as quickly as the light appeared, it faded. Weston’s eyes drooped shut.

He was gone shortly after. The light had taken him…

 

“We know you’re in there. Come out with your hands up!”

The blast had come about an hour after Weston’s passing, blowing open a hole in the ceiling. Sherman snatched up his rifle and trained the sight on the opening. But no one stepped into view. No…they were too smart for that. A small rope was dropped down the hole from somewhere out of sight.

“You have three minutes! If you don’t come out, we will destroy the tunnel! You will die down there soldier. Be certain of that.”

A minute passed. Then another. Sherman was just about to grab his stuff and climb out of the hole when suddenly there was a new sound: an eerie, unnatural whining. It took Sherman a moment to recognize it. It was a military shuttle.

Seconds later the ground quaked with the sound of an explosion. A pillar of dust reached into the sky like a ghastly, diseased hand.

“Otho Prima, disperse immediately and you will not be fired upon,” an amplified voice announced. “If you resist, we will fire again. And we will not miss.”

There was no hesitation. Sherman heard a lot of rapid scuffling as the OP soldiers left the vicinity. A short time after they left he heard the shuttle land. Footsteps approached, then a new voice shouted into the hole.

“Corporal Morris! It’s safe now! You can climb up!”

Sherman slung the rifle and pack over his shoulder, then grabbed the rope and managed to climb into the sun. Two pairs of hands grabbed him and helped pull him up. He dusted himself off as a man approached him, dressed in a blue commander’s uniform.

The two shook hands. “You did a great job tracking down Ares,” the commander said. “Unfortunately, it seems Prima got to you before we could.”

“Yes sir.”

“What about the rest of your squad?”

“All dead sir…they were taken out in the ambush.”

“Son of a bitch…well thank god you’re still alive.”

Soldiers milled about, cleaning up the aftermath of the ambush from the day before. Sherman noticed one of them carrying an old rocket launcher, caked in dust. Then he saw another couple of men carrying something on a stretcher. When the pale hand flopped out from underneath the sheet, Sherman averted his eyes.

The commander pointed into the hole. “Who’s that,” he asked.

Sherman looked down into the old mine. Weston Harper’s body was still leaning against the metal arch, eyes closed. The light barely illuminated his face.

“Do you have a shovel,” he asked as he turned around.

“A shovel?” The commander was puzzled.

“Yes, a shovel. We should give that man a proper burial.”

“Why? Who exactly was he?”

Sherman took one last glance at Weston’s body.

“Human,” he replied. Then he walked off without so much as another word.

He paused just outside the shuttle, taking the silver cross off his neck and holding it in his hand. For so many years it hung there…a present given to him by his mother. It was an older piece of jewelry that had been handed down through generations. The silver gleamed so bright under Otho’s sun that it was nearly blinding.

 

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Ocean

Welcome to the second of twelve short stories I will be writing this year: one each month.  I hope you enjoy and feel free to leave comments below.

 

 

In my dreams, all that awaits is The Ocean.

That’s the only name I have for it. It’s a vast plain of water that extends as far as the eye can see. There are no landmarks, no terrain, nothing but blue forever. Far above, I can see shafts of light breaking through, but no surface.

But that isn’t even the strangest thing about it. During the dream, I feel peaceful and calm. I float without a care in the world. But when I wake up, I find myself drenched in a cold sweat, my heart pounding and my hands shaking. I’ve run into the bathroom so many times to find wild green eyes staring back at me, light brown hair damp with sweat. I grip the sink as hard as I can, usually so much so that my hands grow sore.

Then, it just stops. The terror fades and no trace lingers. I wipe myself off with a wet washcloth and return to bed, my wife Carrie still sound asleep.

Night after night this has happened for months now, the same dream over and over again. But it never impacted my daily life, just my sleep. I figured it would pass in time, that it wouldn’t be a problem.

I was wrong.

“Mr. Turner, the doctor will be with you in a moment.”

I raised my hand and nodded at the receptionist. But she had already gone back to her work, typing away at the computer. Her manner was blunt, unfriendly. She greeted people with about as much cheer as a rock. That being said, I couldn’t blame her. From the looks of things, she was about college age, which meant that she was probably working two separate jobs and going to school at the same time.

Anything to pay the bills.

Taking my eyes off the receptionist, I let them drift across the white plaster walls of the waiting room. Just a month ago I never would have thought I’d end up here, paying someone whose entire job was to listen to people whine about their problems.

Hubris, thy name is John Turner.

Looking back on things, it wasn’t even the dream that did me in. It was everything else…

 

The first time it happened I was on my way home.

I worked in the city and lived in a small suburban community just on the outskirts. Normally I could just drive on the main road into the city and get to work easily, but then they started construction and blocked off fourth avenue. So I was forced to take the freeway instead. It added about fifteen minutes to my drive, but I didn’t mind. The route took me through some countryside scenery that I didn’t get to see very often: green trees lining the side of the road, the sun streaming down from above…on days when it wasn’t cloudy.

In any case, I was on my way home from work. It had been a perfectly ordinary day where nothing interesting happened. I was ready to get back home, have dinner with Carrie, then sit down on the couch and watch some TV.

It started when I was fumbling with the radio. I was looking for a different station, adjusting the dial, when suddenly I could barely hear the radio. The music coming through the speakers sounded muffled and far away. Then the numbers on the clock and the radio dial began to shimmer and warp. They pulsed and waved like reflections in a pond. I would have considered it magical, if my heart hadn’t been beating at a hundred miles a minute.

The road grumbled beneath me. In a flurry of panic, I snapped my head up and jerked my car back into the lane.

That’s when I noticed. It wasn’t just the radio. It was the entire world.

The trees on the side of the road looked like quivering, amorphous snakes. Their branches and leaves were warping side to side. The lines on the road kept snaking left to right. A car passed me by. It might have been a dark green, but it was impossible for me to tell. All the colors in the world were dull, filtered through a strange blue haze.

Even in my impaired state I spotted a rest area off to the side of the highway. Without thinking I jerked the wheel hard to the right, streaking across the other lane of traffic. A distant beeping reached my ears, probably someone honking at me in anger after I cut them off. Speeding into the parking lot, I picked an empty spot just past the entrance. I jumped out of the car without even turning it off. As I ran down the grassy hill past the lot I tripped and fell flat on my face.

I rolled over onto my back and stared up at the sky. The clouds shimmered and shook. The world pulsed all around me and my stomach churned. I snapped my eyes shut, unable to shake the sensation that I was going to fall off the face of the planet.

And then it all stopped, just like that.

After a moment, I opened my eyes. The world had returned to normal, the sunlight now blinding and forcing me to squint. I got to my feet and brushed the grass off my pants and shirt. I slowly walked back up the hill and toward my car. With a grimace, I noticed the green stain on my leg. And on my good pants too, I thought to myself.

“Bro, are you okay?”

I stopped and turned in the direction of the voice. A little ways away, just a couple of spots from where I left my car running, was a young man kneeling by the side of his car. He looked like your typical dude-bro college guy: baseball cap, white t-shirt, baggy blue jeans. He was apparently in the process of changing a flat tire. His car was jacked up and he was holding a crossbar in his hand.

“Dude, do you need help or something,” he asked.

I was suddenly and acutely aware of everything I had done: cutting across lanes of traffic without signaling, parking haphazardly across two different parking spots, running and tripping down the hill in a frenzied panic. Embarrassment overwhelmed me and I was all but certain that my cheeks were bright red with shame.

I jumped into my car and drove off without saying a word.

 

I didn’t say anything to Carrie that night at dinner. She had been working overtime lately. The engineering firm was in the midst of a special project with power plants all around the state. Something about increasing efficiency I think. I can’t remember. In any case, I didn’t want to add more to her plate. She had enough on her mind.

I remember thinking she knew something was wrong, or at least suspected. Her deep blue eyes had scanned me from across the table, peeking out from under the bangs of her long, reddish hair. At work she keeps her hair tied up in a scrunchie, but at home she lets it hang loose around her shoulders.

I could feel her gaze probing me, searching for a hint, a clue as to what was wrong. She didn’t ask me outright. She’d never been one to pry. But I can tell she wanted to.

The events of the day had definitely taken their toll on me. I assumed that my strange incident was just a by-product of me not getting enough sleep, so from that night on I started going to bed an hour earlier than normal. The Ocean still haunted my dreams, but I felt a little more rested during the day.

Like a fool, I assumed that my incident was only a fluke…

 

The second episode happened while I was on my lunch break a week later.

My workplace was nothing special. It was your typical cubicle nightmare, rows as far as the eye could see. Everything was nearly identical: each cubicle had a small desk with drawers, a brown coffee mug, and a computer. I didn’t mind it. I was never much of a creative or artistic person growing up. But I was always good with numbers. So it made sense that I ended up at an accounting firm, working a nine to five job.

When our lunch break came, I was relieved. Staring at the computer screen all morning was making my eyes hurt and I hadn’t slept too well the night before. So I took leave of the cubicle and made my way to the break room. Like everything else at the office, the break room wasn’t special: white tables and chairs, some cupboards, a refrigerator, a counter with sink and microwave, and a dishwasher.

For my lunch, I grabbed a small brown bag I had left in the refrigerator and sat down at one of the tables. It didn’t take long before I spotted Paul walking into the room. I had met him in college and he was one of my best friends. He had light brown hair, brown eyes, and a youthful look about him. He wore a blue polo shirt with black dress pants.

You could tell he was different even before he said anything. His eyes roamed around the room like someone who could never sit still. Even his gait was unusually bouncy, almost like a kangaroo.

“Hey John,” he called when he spotted me.

“What’s up Paul,” I called back. He took a seat across the table from me.

“What you eatin’,” he asked. I held up my sandwich: plain lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise with some meat and cheese.

“Same old, same old,” I replied. “You?”

“Eh,” he shrugged, “I’m not having lunch today. I’m fasting.”

“Fasting?”

“Yeah, choosing not to eat food for a couple days, that kind of thing.”

“You do realize that fasting is dangerous right? Like it’s scientifically proven.”

“Ah…that’s just what all those government paid scientists want you to think.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Oh really?”

Paul was an avid conspiracy theorist, the kind of guy who never believed the official story.

“It’s all a product of the food industry,” he said. “They want you to think you need to eat more than you need to so that you’ll buy more. I mean, have you seen the food pyramid? How in the hell am I supposed to get six to eleven servings of bread and cereal in a day?”

“I suppose next you’ll be telling me that physical fitness is a sham as well,” I asked.

“Don’t mock what you don’t know John,” he said with a smile. I teased him about all the conspiracy stuff, but he understood it was all in good fun.

“In any case,” he continued, “that’s the least of it.”

“What do you mean,” I asked.

“You know that road closure on fourth?”

“Yeah. Almost made me late last month. What about it?”

“What if I told you the closure has nothing to do with road construction? What if I told you that there was never any road construction at all?”

“You gonna give me a choice between the red and the blue pill next?”

“Laugh all you want,” he said, “but tell me, have you ever actually seen the construction workers down there do any work?”

“Well no, but I’m not exactly driving by during peak work hours. And besides, isn’t that the cliché, that you never see them working?”

“That’s exactly what they’re counting on.”

“Oh? And what, pray tell, is actually going on down there?”

Paul gave me a knowing smirk.

“It all has to do with that construction site down on tenth street.”

“The new high-rise? I heard something about that on the news last week. There was some kind of industrial accident that halted construction…a machine malfunction that caused a small chemical leak or something.”

“Oldest story in the book,” Paul said, shrugging it off.

“So what’s the ‘real’ story then,” I asked.

“Okay, get ready for this,” Paul said, rubbing his hands together like he was a magician revealing his secrets. He paused a moment before his big reveal. “Aliens.”

“Aliens?”

“Aliens.”

I scoffed. “Seriously? Aliens? Hey, speaking of oldest story in the book…”

“I’m dead serious. There’s some really shady stuff going on down there.”

“Like what?”

“Moving in large amounts of equipment, more than should be required for a chemical spill. I mean you can see the place from the freeway. Haven’t you noticed anything odd about it?”

I had to admit, he did have a point. I took a glance at the area once while I was stuck in traffic. There were large black trailer trucks driving in to the lot, but I was never able to see what came out of them. They drove down into the pit and out of sight. Still, I was a long ways from believing that extraterrestrials were involved.

“You still don’t believe me, do you,” Paul asked.

“I mean next you’ll be telling me it’s the Illuminati collecting advanced technology to further their New World Order.”

“Oh please,” Paul scoffed. “Illuminati, Reptilians, New World Order…it’s all a bunch of nonsense invented by people who try too hard to be counter-culture.”

I guess some things are too crazy even for Paul, I thought to myself.

“So what do you think it is then,” I asked.

“Well, I think they did find something down there, some kind of alien technology or craft. That site has given off abnormal electromagnetic readings since…forever really.”

“You could get abnormal electromagnetic readings from a gas station in Toronto. Doesn’t mean there’s an alien ship parked in the garage.”

“You mock me, but do you have any better explanation for what’s going on there?”

“Oh I don’t know,” I said, “…a chemical spill maybe? An industrial accident?”

Now it was Paul’s turn to scoff.

“Real clever John.”

“Well fine then. Tell me your theory.”

“With pleasure,” Paul said, relishing the chance. “Due to the abundance of electromagnetic energy and the fact that strange, unidentified lights have been sighted over the area recently, I firmly believe that they found some kind of alien spaceship buried beneath the ground. I think it’s been buried there for hundreds, maybe thousands of years, from a time before humans even walked the Earth. The government wants to study whatever is inside so that-“

Suddenly, I couldn’t understand what he was saying anymore. His mouth was clearly moving, but the words sounded like they were coming from miles away. My hands started to shake. Paul was too engrossed in explaining his theory to notice.

Then his mouth began to quiver.

Then his whole face.

Soon enough, his entire body was warping before my eyes. The white walls of the break room grew dull, covered by an invisible shroud of blue. I stared, unblinking, into the wavy chaos that had taken over the world.

Reflections, I thought. Reflections in a pond.

I gripped the table hard, trying to stop my hands from quivering. Then I saw a blurry, nightmarish figure slinking into sight behind Paul. I stared in alarm at this strange apparition as it approached, wondering if I should shout and warn Paul. Closer and closer it came, a menacing shadow that warped and shifted before my eyes.

A monster, come to devour our souls.

“John, you all right,” a voice said, clear as day.

And with that, everything snapped back into place. The monstrous shadow figure was revealed to be nothing more than another one of our co-workers named Adrian. Paul had stopped rambling. He glanced at Adrian for a second, then turned back toward me.

“John…what’s wrong,” Paul asked, squinting at me. “You’re sweating like crazy.”

I got up from my chair and looked at my hands. I flexed them for a moment as I tried to concentrate on my breathing.

“Sorry…I just…I have a bad headache,” I mumbled as I ran out of the room.

I stumbled into the single-person bathroom and locked the door behind me. My hands were still shaking and I couldn’t make them stop. I took a step and the floor swayed under my feet, causing me to crash into the sink and nearly bang my head against the faucet.

“This can’t be happening,” I muttered to myself.

The blue tint came back and permeated everything. My breathing was muffled and distant. The same sensation from the rest stop overtook me. It was like some unseen force was trying to carry me away into the ether.

“This can’t be happening…”

I collapsed to my knees, shaking and weak.

“This can’t be happening!”

An unearthly wind nipped at my heels. The world quaked. I gripped the white porcelain of the sink like my life depended on it. I was convinced that everything I ever knew and loved would fade away if I let go. My eyes closed.

“Stop…stop…stop,” I shouted.

Somehow, it worked. My ears cleared, the world stopped shaking, and the wind vanished. A moment later I opened my eyes again and got to my feet. Although it had subsided, I felt that something still wasn’t right. The lights were too dim and none of the familiar sounds of the office reached my ears.

“Hello,” I wanted to shout, but my voice came out as nothing but a faint croak.

I looked under the door and noticed there was no light spilling in from the bottom. The only thing beyond was an inky blackness, like a wall that prevented me from escaping. I turned back toward the mirror.

And I knew it was wrong. It was all wrong.

It wasn’t my reflection. I seemed fine aside from the traces of panic and sweat on my face. But the mirror itself seemed…off. The more and more I stared into it the more certain I was. I squinted as hard as I could, but I found nothing that would explain my irrational feeling.

I finally saw it when I leaned to the side.

At an angle, the inside of the mirror looked stretched, as if the surface now extended an impossible distance behind it. My mind had trouble grasping it all, but it didn’t appear solid anymore, like the glass had morphed into a thick liquid.

My heart beat in my ears.

My hands shook.

My breath was ragged and uneven.

An irrational compulsion took over, making me reach toward the mirror. My hand drew closer and closer to its surface. When my fingers were less than an inch away, I stopped and flinched. What the hell am I doing, I thought. This isn’t real. None of this is real. It can’t be…

But I forced myself to continue. After a moment my hand went through the surface and I gasped. It was cold…frigid even. I swished my fingers around, trying to get a sense for the world beyond. But a few seconds later something grabbed me and pulled with incredible strength. I screamed and tried to withdraw my hand from the mirror, but to no avail. I was being dragged into it.

NO NO NO,” I shouted at the top of my lungs. “Somebody, anybody, for the love of god, help me!”

But I was alone, trapped in this nightmare world. There was no escape.

It wasn’t long before I was up to my elbows in the mirror. I fought it as hard as I possibly could, but it did nothing. Every time I struggled, I was only pulled in faster and faster. I forced my eyes shut, praying that it would all be over.

My face broke the surface, the icy world beyond now caressing my entire body. I opened my eyes-

 

-and found myself on the bathroom floor, looking up at the ceiling. I could hear hushed voices nearby.

“Hey, he’s awake!”

“Is he okay?”

“Why was he screaming?”

A moment later Paul’s face appeared above me with an expression of alarm. I turned my head and saw people crowded around the open doorway. The bathroom door was now laying in the middle of the hallway. Apparently they had to bust it down to get inside.

“John, are you all right? What happened,” Paul asked.

I had no answer for him. I had no answer for any of it.

My boss told me to take the next couple of days off, get some rest. I kept telling him I was fine, but even I knew that was a total lie.

I wasn’t fine.

I was terrified. I had no idea what was happening to me. And no matter how much I wanted things to return to normal, it just wasn’t happening.

Reluctantly, I took the offer. When I exited the building, the sun was shining bright and the birds were chirping in a nearby park. It was a peaceful day, but that did nothing to soothe my soul. I hopped into the car, turned the key into the ignition, and started my way home.

Normally the sights of the countryside were calming, but not today. The trees seemed to bend over my car with malice, greedily hiding the truth…

 

I arrived home half an hour later. Carrie and I were by no means rich, but we were able to secure a nice spot in a suburban neighborhood just outside the city. It was the spitting image of the American dream: two-story white house, white picket fence, flower garden, and a front porch with screens to keep the bugs out.

I pulled into the attached garage. As I turned off the car I looked over at the empty spot beside me. Carrie wouldn’t be back from work for at least a few hours.

Walking into the downstairs bathroom, I almost didn’t recognize the person in the mirror. He looked haggard and weak, dark circles underneath his eyes. I had kept telling myself that I could handle things. But the episode at work today was a clear indication that I was wrong.

I turned on the faucet and splashed some water on my face. Deep down inside I knew I should tell Carrie about what happened, but I kept coming up with reasons not to: she’ll leave me, she’ll call the police, she’ll commit me to a mental asylum. Scenario after scenario swarmed around my brain like a bunch of insects.

I’ll just take a couple days off and rest. Everything will be fine, I told myself.

The rest of my afternoon was spent on the couch watching daytime television. I had never thought about it before, but there was nothing worthwhile to watch during the afternoon. The vast majority was talk shows about cute animal videos or people mouthing off about the latest political hoopla. They talked and they talked, but said very little. It was like a massive echo chamber.

But as a proud American, I performed my duty by continuing to watch. Because…well what else was I going to do? Besides, it was a good way to take my mind off of everything.

And so I settled into the couch. At about a quarter to six I heard the familiar clunk of the garage door rising and the chugging of Carrie’s car as it eased into its spot. When she entered into the kitchen, she found me leaning against the living room doorway.

“Hey you,” I said with a smile.

“Hey,” she replied. “How was work today?”

“Oh…fine. Same old, same old.”

And for a fraction of a second, I saw her lips purse into a slight frown. As always, she saw right through me. She knew something was wrong, that something had happened. Perhaps she saw a flicker of shame in my eyes. Maybe something in my voice gave it away.

Or maybe it was the noise of the television in the background, which I never turned on until after we ate dinner.

Whatever the case was, the frown vanished almost immediately.

“Well that’s good to hear,” she said, trying her best to stay calm. But even I could hear the slight tremor in her voice.

For a brief moment, my mouth opened like I was ready to let the floodgates open and confess everything. I felt a powerful urge to tell her, to reveal the cracks that were forming within me. But my stupid pride won, as it always did. So my mouth shut as quickly as it had opened.

Carrie never noticed it. She was too busy emptying things from her purse.

“Hey, can you take care of the dishes,” she asked, pointing to the stack of plates next to the sink. “The dishwasher’s still on the fritz and the repairman can’t make it out until Friday.”

“Sure thing,” I said as I walked over to the sink, thankful for anything to occupy my mind.

“I’m gonna head outside and water the flowers. I’ll be back,” Carrie said. A moment later I heard the front porch door open and close.

I flipped on the faucet and got to work. For how monotonous it was, cleaning was a good way to clear the mind. And for a while, it worked. My mind was taken up by the slow swishing of the water and the dull circular motion I made with the sponge. I lost myself in the rush of water spilling out from the faucet.

The water…

I stopped. The plate and sponge hung from my hands as I stood like a statue, never moving. I couldn’t take my eyes off it. I couldn’t even blink. And then…it was like time itself started to break down. I could actually see the individual droplets falling into the sink like rain drops. The air around me warbled, and my ears were filled with a distant ringing.

My heart thundered. My eyes quaked.

The sink, the plate, the faucet, even my hands became blurry, shifting figments of their former selves. Feeling the panic rise in my chest, I stepped backward and dropped everything from my hands. The plate made a muffled, distant clank as it fell into the sink.

My breathing was erratic. I felt like my chest was about to explode. I clenched my hands together, closed my eyes, and fought against the urge to scream.

It’s not real

It’s not real

It’s not real

But no matter how many times I told myself that, the nightmare wouldn’t fade. I could feel my entire body shaking and it wouldn’t stop. I knew I had to open my eyes, but every fiber in my being was telling me not to. The warbling grew louder and louder.

I had to do it.

I opened my eyes.

The world was a vast blue expanse as far as the eye could see-

 

-and then there was light. A blinding light. I had to shield my eyes as I sat up.

“What,” I mumbled, my vision still blurry.

I was on the living room couch. But how? My eyes whipped about the room…

…and settled on Carrie, who was slunk down in the armchair across the room. She was staring at me, a disconcerted look in her eyes. The TV had been turned off, so a long silence passed between the two of us.

“John,” she said finally as she sat up, “what in the hell was that?” Her cheeks were puffy and her eyes were red.

“Carrie, I-“

“No, you are not going to brush this one off,” she said, her voice rising to a near shout.

Her sudden burst of anger took me off guard and I was silent for a moment. Then she settled back into her seat and waited for me to speak.

“I…I don’t know what happened,” I began. “The last thing I remember is standing in front of the sink. I was cleaning the dishes when…when,” I paused, searching for the right words, “when suddenly the world…went away.”

Carrie’s eyes narrowed. “What are you talking about?”

“I can’t explain it very well,” I said. “Everything around me…was like an illusion that wasn’t really there. I closed my eyes and tried to tell myself it wasn’t real, that it wasn’t happening. When I opened them again, there was nothing but…water.”

“You don’t remember screaming?”

My eyes went wide. “What?”

“You were screaming John,” she said. “You were screaming and shaking and you fell to the floor and I didn’t know what to do and I-” She stopped, averting her gaze and trying not to cry.

I lowered my eyes to the floor. It was the office all over again.

Carrie took a few deep breaths, the expression on her face one of calm and determination.

“I knew something was going on with you. You’ve been waking up in the middle of the night a lot recently. And then there was that night last week at dinner where you were evasive whenever I asked you about your day. I knew the moment I came home that something else had happened. I should have pushed you, but I didn’t. I didn’t…and now this happened.”

I looked up into her eyes. And that’s what finally broke me.

“Oh god,” I moaned, burying my face in my hands. “Oh god, I need help.”

I heard Carrie get up and felt her sit down next to me. A second later her hands were on my shoulders, gently massaging them.

“John, it’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay. I know someone who can help…”

 

Leaning back in my seat, I cast my eyes along the white plaster walls. A painting of a log cabin on the shore of a lake sat just opposite from me. To my left, a series of tall windows looked out over the city. We were on the thirtieth floor of a high-rise building. Most of the other floors were for accountants, business people, and the like. But some were for specialized professionals, like the psychiatrist I was going to see.

Carrie said the doctor’s name was Silas Lavoie. For some reason, the name “Silas” made me think of a snake. I had to push the image out of my head. I was never very trusting of psychiatrists. My stint with daytime television certainly hadn’t helped matters in that regard.

“Mr. Turner?” I turned toward the reception desk. “Head on in. The doctor will join you in just a moment.”

I entered the office. The moment the door closed behind me, all the noise of the reception area ceased to exist, as though I had walked through a portal into another world. The walls were made of a charming, varnished wood. Thick white blinds adorned the sides of a massive window looking out over the city. I could see the coastline in the distance.

In the middle of the room was a glass table. On one side of the table was the typical brown couch that you always see in the movies or on television. On the other side was the armchair I presumed the doctor sat in. Knowing my place, I sat down on the couch.

In the couple of minutes or so before the doctor entered, I imagined what he would look like: balding, glasses, stuffy suit and tie. He would speak with an overblown air of intellectualism, because he wanted to sound smart. But when the doctor finally entered with a clipboard in hand, I found that my assumptions were way off-base.

He wasn’t wearing a stuffy suit. He had on a pleasant red polo shirt and cargo slacks. Instead of balding, he had nicely cropped brown hair. When we shook hands and introduced ourselves, I noticed that he had a charming French Canadian accent.

But he was wearing glasses, so I got something right.

“All right John, let’s get started. I see you were referred to me by…” He flipped the paper on the clipboard over. “Ah! Your wife Carrie. I treated her sister you know.”

“Her sister?”

“Yes, Isabelle. She had serious postpartum depression after she gave birth to her twin boys…Carrie never mentioned that to you?”

“Oh uh…no she did. I guess it just slipped my mind.”

“These things happen,” he said as he began writing something on the clipboard.

“So…how much has Carrie told you,” I asked.

“Not a lot. Something about nightmares spilling over into real life.”

“Yes. I’ve been having the same dream for about four months or so now.”

“Then perhaps that’s the best place to start. Tell me about this dream.”

I described it as best as I could.

“And it’s endless? No landmarks? Nothing specific?”

“No just…blue. Like I said, I can see light coming from above but that’s about it.”

“How does this place make you feel?”

“Peaceful. Serene. Like I belong.”

“Interesting.”

“But when I wake up I…panic. I run into the bathroom and I find myself drenched with sweat. My hands are shaking and my heart is pounding. I can practically feel adrenaline coursing through my body. But then minutes later it’s all gone.”

“I see…” The doctor scribbled on his clipboard for a moment.

“Doc, how long is this going to take,” I asked.

Lavoie chuckled. “Oh if I had a nickel…I’m going to give you the same answer I give everyone. You won’t like it, but it is what it is. It’ll take as long as it takes. You can’t rush these things John, nor can you predict them. You could be done tomorrow or next week or two months from now. I really can’t say.”

“I understand…thanks for being honest.” Lavoie nodded, then wrote some more on his clipboard.

“Okay, next item: describe your workplace.”

“Not much to say really. Cubicles, computers, pens, and coffee mugs. Lunch break at 12:30. Just your typical nine to five job.”

“Run me through your daily routine.”

I spent the next five minutes going over it in as much detail as I could.

“Hmm,” the doctor mused once I had finished. “And it’s like that every single day?”

“Pretty much,” I said. “Every once in a while we get a special project, but most of the day yeah it’s just spreadsheets and numbers.”

“Hmm,” the doctor said again, jotting down some notes. “Well, my initial hypothesis would be that you feel trapped.”

“Trapped?”

“Yes, in your life, in your job. But more importantly, in your routine. You do the same thing every single day. When was your last vacation?”

“It was…god I can’t remember. Ten years ago maybe?”

“Well there you go. I would hypothesize that your dream of being in an ‘endless ocean’, as you describe it, hints at some desire to be free. That’s why you feel so at peace in the dream state. But when you wake up, you realize on a subconscious level that you’re trapped once again. So you panic.”

I shrugged. “Makes sense I guess. Sounds a little too Freudian to me though.”

“Don’t worry,” Lavoie said, “We’re not about to drag your mother into this.”

I had to admit, I laughed.

“Although it still doesn’t explain why you started slipping into that dream while you were awake,” Lavoie continued, his pen moving rapidly across the clipboard. “Maybe some kind of fugue state? Does your family have any history of psychiatric disorders?”

“Not that I know of,” I replied.

The doctor was silent for a moment as he continued writing. I shuffled in my seat, uncomfortable with the silence.

“I have another hypothesis,” Lavoie said after a moment. “Can you humor me for a bit?”

I shrugged again. “I suppose I could.”

“Good. Tell me about your childhood.”

And so I did. But I only got a minute or so in before a timer went off. Looking around, I spotted it sitting on top of a wooden dresser: a tiny, round white thing.

Funny, I thought. I hadn’t noticed that before.

“Oh well, looks like our time’s up,” Lavoie said.

“It’s been half an hour already?”

“Time flies when you don’t pay attention. Well I’ll see you next week John. Just keep patient,” he said as I stood up. “Keep at it, and you’ll get through this.”

 

The following session went by without much progress. I had no idea why Lavoie wanted me to go over my childhood again and again. Nevertheless, I entertained his request, playing along in the hopes that it would lead somewhere. But I started growing restless and irritated.

Fortunately, during our third session together, there was progress. I was in the middle of recounting my childhood when he raised his hand.

“There,” he said.

“There…what?”

“Right there.”

I shrugged. “I’m not sure I follow.”

“John you have a meticulous memory. You are able to tell me your exact daily routine at work and the events of your childhood. But around age nine or ten, your memory is suddenly spotty, full of holes. There’s a strange lack of detail.”

“So? I was a kid.”

“Yes, but you’re able to tell me quite a bit about that time you got lost in the grocery store when you were eight. Or about the time you accidentally trampled the neighbor’s flower garden when you were twelve. In fact, you can tell me a lot about your entire life. That’s just how your memory works. But at age nine or ten, there’s almost nothing.”

I hadn’t thought about it before, but he was right. I was stunned.

“What does it mean,” I asked, a little afraid of the answer.

“If I had to guess, I would say that some kind of tragic incident occurred when you were nine or ten. Your mind buried that memory because it was too troublesome for you. And now, I think that memory is trying to come to the surface.”

A snake slithered into my mind’s eye. I shook it off.

“So what can we do?”

“John,” Lavoie said, “I’d like to put you under hypnosis and try to recover that memory. Confronting it is the best way to deal with it. Do I have your permission to try?”

“Sure,” I said. “When can we begin?”

“Right now, in fact. That’s what the old pocket watch is for,” he said, proudly patting the golden watch sitting on the glass table.

“Has that always been there,” I asked.

“Yes,” he said, puzzled. “I always have it out during my sessions.”

“Huh,” I mumbled as I stared at it.

“Anyways, let’s get started. Lie down and put your head back. I’m going to start counting down from ten…”

 

Cold. Wet.

John can you hear me?

Can’t breathe. Can’t see.

John, where are you?

Blue. So cold. Can’t breathe. Light. Light from above.

John, calm down! You’re going to be okay!

Wet.

Blue.

Cold.

John? John!

Can’t breathe. CAN’T BREATHE.

It’s not working!

We can’t stop! We’ve come too far to give up now!

Something’s coming. Breaking the surface.

Reaching for me.

Coming for me.

When I count to three, you will awaken.

Shadow. Coming.

One…

So tired. Sleep.

Two…

Hands. Reaching.

I can’t-

 

“Three.”

And with that, I jolted awake. I was still in the psychiatrist’s office. My hands were shaking and my face was sweating.

“What,” I panted, “what happened?”

“I hypnotized you. Don’t you remember,” Lavoie asked.

“I don’t…I remember you saying to lie down but I don’t really remember much after that except-“

An image of blurry hands reaching flashed by my mind, making me flinch.

“After I put you under, I tried to bring you back to a time when you were ten years old,” Lavoie explained. “But the closer we got to whatever happened to you, the harder you started to push back. You started mumbling at first. Then later, you started screaming.”

“Screaming?”

“Yes. It was admittedly quite disconcerting.”

I rubbed my face with my hands and groaned aloud.

“In any case,” the doctor continued, “I think that will be it for our session today. It appears that hypnotism only made things worse.”

I stared ahead at the wall, a blank expression on my face.

“John? John are you okay,” Lavoie asked.

“I had a pool as a kid, didn’t I?”

“Yes you did. You’ve mentioned it to me each time we went over your childhood.”

“It was an outdoor pool set in the ground and surrounded by cement,” I continued, lost in thought.

“Yes. I don’t understand where you’re going-“

“There was a diving board. An old one. My parents were gonna get it replaced. But then it happened.”

“John…you never mentioned the diving board before. Why are you mentioning it now?”

I turned and looked at him.

“Because I remember.”

 

It had been one of the hottest summers on record. I was ten years old, playing in the backyard and I wanted to go for a swim. My dad told me to wait until he could be there to watch me. But I was impatient. I threw on my swim trunks and headed right over to the pool.

Even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to, I hopped onto the diving board. For a moment, I remembered my dad saying something about it getting old and being unsafe. But I shook it off as I approached the edge. I stared into the water. It shimmered white under the bright sun. It looked cool and refreshing. All I wanted was to dive in.

But when I started to bounce the diving board didn’t bounce back like it should have. It bent at an awkward angle and snapped, a large crack appearing in its surface. I slipped, the back of my head slamming down against the board. My skull vibrated and my head burned. I hit the water like a ton of bricks and sank down toward the bottom of the deep end. I tried to swim, but the shock of what had happened made my whole body numb.

I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. I was frantic, trying with all my might to force my muscles to work, to force myself to swim to the surface. But it was no use.

Then, it all started to fade. The fear vanished and a strange calm took its place. I felt tired. I just wanted to sleep. Everything seemed peaceful and right. I barely even noticed how the world started to fade away.

Something broke the surface. A pair of hands frantically reached for me. But they were so far away. So very, far away…

 

“The next thing I can remember is waking up on the grass, my father’s terrified, wet face looking down at me. Later, at the hospital, I asked him if he was mad at me. He just smiled and said he was glad I was okay,” I finished.

“A near-death experience like that as a child can be fairly traumatic. I imagine your brain suppressed the memory as a way of coping with it,” Lavoie explained.

“But then why now?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why did the memory surface now,” I asked.

“With things like this it’s almost impossible to say. Maybe your monotonous work routine triggered it somehow. Maybe the sight of something knocked it loose in your brain. Or maybe…it was time.”

“So…is that it then,” I asked.

“I imagine so,” Lavoie said. “Your dream should no longer trouble you now that you’ve confronted the memory.”

“Oh thank god,” I said with relief. I stood up from the couch. “Well thanks doctor. For everything.”

“My pleasure John. It is my job after all.”

I had to admit, I was wrong about Lavoie.  He was a genuinely nice person who really cared. And to think, I was ready to brush him off as nothing more than-

Snake

Snake

Snake

Liar

The blood in my veins chilled. I stood rigid, my eyes fixed on Lavoie’s face.

“Carrie never had a sister, did she?”

Lavoie’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “John, I don’t understand. Of course Carrie has a sister. I’ve met her. I’ve treated her.”

“No, she doesn’t. She’s never mentioned her. I’ve never met her. She doesn’t exist.”

“John, I-“

Don’t you lie to me,” I suddenly screamed, growing angrier with each passing second.

“You’re obviously confused. Please, sit down for a moment. I’m afraid you might be having a relapse.”

“You’ve been lying this entire time,” I said, my voice low and sinister. “You never had any intention of helping me. Carrie never had a sister! I never had a pool as a kid and you never-“

With a snap, the world blurred. The blue shadow fell over everything. The ringing returned. This time, it was so loud that it caused me to cry out in pain and fall back onto the couch. I held my head in my hands as the noise assaulted my ears.

Make it stop! Make it stop,” I shouted. My voice was so far away.

Gradually, the ringing faded. I looked up and stared at Lavoie. All traces of friendliness had vanished from his face. Instead, he fixed me with the cold stare of someone who was a complete stranger. His demeanor had changed, like he had become callous and mean in the span of the last few seconds. He was an entirely different man.

I stood up. Lavoie glared back at me with the same, unflinching look.

Snake

Liar

Snake

Liar

I dove at him, hands outstretched. But Lavoie rolled out of his chair and my hand fumbled uselessly against the fabric. The doctor got to his feet and was running for the door, but I was too fast. I grabbed him by the collar and dragged him backwards. He stumbled and fell into the glass table. It shattered with a crash, shards of glass littering the floor.

I approached Lavoie, ready to drag him to his feet. But he grabbed a piece of glass, got to his feet, and took a swing at me. I jumped back, but not quick enough. A jagged edge of glass caught the back of my hand, slicing it open. I gasped in pain and stumbled backwards.

Blood dripped down from my open wound, staining the floor.

I held my uninjured hand over the wound and turned my attention back to Lavoie. He had adopted a fighting stance, bouncing back and forth in front of me like some demented cartoon dancer. It was obvious he had no formal training in something like this and was winging it as he went along.

I glared at him. I wanted to kill him. My entire being seethed with hatred.

Lavoie stepped forward to deliver another swing. But I was ready this time. I ducked under his swing, the clear shard of glass singing just above my scalp. Moving quickly, I grabbed his arm and twisted as hard as I could. Lavoie’s demented howl of pain reached me from like miles away, a distorted bubbling that sounded inhuman and monstrous. He released his grip on the glass shard and it fell to the floor.

I grabbed him by the shoulders and threw him against the wall. Before he could recover I grabbed him the back of his head, and slammed him face-first against the wood. Then again. And again. He hit the wall so hard that it began to splinter and crack.

There was only darkness beyond: an endless, inky abyss.

I grabbed him by the shoulders and ran toward the large window overlooking the city. I threw the both of us against it, the hard glass exploding outward like confetti.

We emerged into a sunken world, an underwater metropolis.

The watery expanse from my nightmares had taken over. The pinpricks of light inside the skyscrapers looked like tiny, turquoise lanterns. Down below at street level, the people walked along the sidewalks as if nothing was different, their feet gliding over the twisting, warping shades of gray concrete. Distorted rays of light reached down from above, piercing the watery veil.

Lavoie wriggled in the water, trying to swim away. But I wasn’t going to let him. I grabbed him by the ankle and dragged him back down. My hands found his throat and began to squeeze. His eyeballs seemed to bulge out of his head and he struggled against me but to no avail.

I squeezed harder. Bubbles of air shot out of his mouth and nose.

Blood rushed to my face, making it swell with rage.

I squeezed and I squeezed. I wanted him dead. I wanted him to pay for what he’d done. He beat my arms with his fists, but I barely felt anything aside from blinding anger. I wanted to feel his throat collapse under the weight of my hands.

I wanted to see the last bits of life drain out of his body. I wanted to-

 

I snapped awake, a familiar clicking and ringing reaching my ears. The glare of the computer screen made my eyes hurt for a second before I realized where I was: back in my cubicle at the office.

“Hey John, get enough sleep there?”

I turned to find Paul standing nearby.

“Paul…how did I get here,” I asked.

“What do you mean,” he asked back with a laugh. “I mean, I would guess you drove your car, but for all I know maybe you flew here. The government’s been doing secret genetic experiments for a long time after all.”

“No seriously, how did I get here? I don’t remember coming in this morning.”

“Man…you must be more tired than you thought.”

My eyes darted back and forth around the office.

“Paul, you have to listen to me. The last thing I remember is being in the psychiatrist’s office,” I said.

“Psychiatrist’s office? A little on the nose, don’t you think?”

“I don’t know what’s a dream and what isn’t anymore.”

“Okay, don’t get all philosophical on me there Socrates.”

Damn it Paul! I’m serious!” Several people looked over their cubicles at us.

“Okay okay!” Paul took a step toward me. “Just…calm down. We’ll figure this out. What’s the last thing you remember?”

“Like I said, I was in the psychiatrist’s office. We were talking about my childhood. And then…” I paused, searching for the words, “…something happened. I can’t really explain what, but it was almost like reality itself broke down.”

“John,” Paul said, his voice reassuring, “you know as well as I do that dreams can feel like they take place over days or hours. You’re probably just groggy and confused.”

“I am not confused. Something is happening here,” I insisted.

“Look, let’s just get back to work and we can talk about it over lunch.” He turned to leave.

“Paul…what day is it?”

He froze mid-step.

“What?”

“Paul, what day is it today?”

He turned around to face me. He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. “John…I don’t understand what-“

“You don’t know, do you?”

“What?”

“You have no idea what day it is. And you never did.”

The warbling came from an incredible distance away. Paul’s expression sank into something familiar. It was the same vacant, hostile look that Lavoie had. Paul was no longer my friend. He was looking at me like a stranger.

The lighting flickered, becoming a dull shade of blue for a split second.

I stood up. I had to get out. I had to get away.

But Paul growled with anger and shoved me backwards. I fell back into my seat and stared at him in confusion. He moved toward me, but I reacted first. I reached out with my leg and kicked him in the chest, his entire body crumpling from the impact. I jumped up from my seat, grabbed him by the shoulders, and threw him against the desk. Before he could react, I grabbed the coffee mug and brought it down against his head. It shattered, pieces of brown ceramic exploding all over his face.

Then I ran. I dashed out of my cubicle and ran. All noise had disappeared: the ringing, the clicking, the talking. There was nothing but me, Paul, and the frantic hollow sound of my feet pounding across the aisle.

Get back here,” I heard Paul roar from behind me.

I didn’t dare look back. I just kept running. I thought about using the elevator, but something about being trapped in a little box made my stomach churn. No, I was going to use the stairs. I spotted the door and rammed my shoulder into it, shoving it open-

 

-and then I fell, the world spinning about my head. Swirls of brown and red crisscrossed my vision as I tumbled end over end. I hit the landing with a hard smack, landing on my back. I groaned, closing my eyes for a second and rubbing the back of my head. Then my eyes registered where I was.

What the fuck,” I said aloud.

It was the kitchen…the kitchen in my house.

“How in the hell…what is going on,” I shouted to no one in particular. I jumped to my feet and began running around the house in a panic.

“Carrie? Carrie!” She didn’t answer.

After checking all the rooms on the first floor I darted up the stairs, taking them two at a time. I kept calling for her, but received no answer. I checked the upstairs bedroom, the study, the bathroom, everywhere. I even pulled down the ladder to the attic and looked in there.

But there was nothing, and no one.

Mopey and defeated, I made my way back down the stairs. I had no control over anything anymore. It was as though I were subject to the whims of an invisible master, a callous child who was dragging me around just for the fun of it. I couldn’t fight back. I couldn’t win. Back down in the kitchen, I took a seat at the table and buried my face in my hands.

“I just want it to stop,” I moaned aloud.

I felt it before I saw it. A blue haze descended upon the world, dimming the bright yellow light of the sun. I stood up and looked out the kitchen windows. Shafts of light stretched down from above, casting a diluted glow upon the neighborhood. The houses drifted in and out of focus as I stared at them.

Then I looked up at the sky. My mind balked at what I saw.

I dashed out the front door, letting it slam shut behind me. There was no wind. Cars and houses lined the street, but there were no people. I stood next to Carrie’s flower garden, my head craned upward and my mind trying its best to comprehend what I was looking at.

The best comparison I could make was to a snow globe.

My house and the street beyond were normal, just empty. But all of it was surrounded by water, thick and blue and dark. It was everywhere, at the ends of the street, in the sky…all around me. The street seemed to carve out a small bubble of existence in this strange place. And an invisible force held the water back, kept it from consuming my little haven.

I walked out into the street, looking both directions. Empty and barren. I could hear the warbling of the water. I could see it moving, swirling around the invisible barrier keeping it from entering.

And then, the levee broke.

Water fell from above and water worked its way down the street toward me. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t think. I was terrified. But at the same time, I had to know. I had an inexplicable feeling that the answers I was looking for lay beyond that impenetrable ocean veil.

So I let it come.

The water snaked through the streets and reached down from above. When it finally hit me I wasn’t knocked off my feet like I thought I would be. It just surrounded me. My feet left the ground and I began to float higher and higher. The black asphalt of the street vanished beneath me: cars and all. The houses faded away, one by one, until only mine was left. It stayed there for a moment, almost like it was clawing at me, trying to prevent me from getting away. But then it too faded into the gloom, faded into nothingness.

And then here I was again, The Ocean.

It was just as I remembered it, endless and blue. I floated there for what felt like an eternity, enjoying the peace that came with it. I wasn’t afraid. I wasn’t frustrated and confused. I was content to just be.

But then, a new sound reached my ears. It was a kind of beeping, one I wasn’t familiar with. And slowly, voices came along with it.

“-not working…”

“-failing again…”

“Keep trying! We have to keep trying!”

A mysterious, curved object appeared in front of me. At first, I didn’t understand what it was, but then I realized I could see beyond it, like a window. I swam forward and peeked through.

Through the window, I could see into a room filled with pieces of computer equipment. People were running around in a panic, their eyes darting toward me every now and then. In the far back, next to some massive metal door, stood two people in black. They were wearing heavy Kevlar vests and held large assault rifles in their hands. Both of them had a stoic expression on their face, although I could tell they were afraid. I don’t know how I knew it, but they were gripping the rifles in their hands tightly. I could sense it.

Then I looked to the right. And what I saw only confused me more.

On a small computer screen there were rows of orange text, like bullet points. It was a list of ages: one to three, three to five, five to seven, seven to nine, and so on. I couldn’t grasp what it was all about, but then I saw the whiteboard next to it. It was a flowchart, with various branching bubbles.

And it all started with a large bubble in the center that read “pool accident”.

What the hell is this, I thought. Are they cataloging my whole life?

I scanned my eyes over some of the bubbles. One of them read “saved by” with two offshoots reading “mom” and “dad”. The one reading “dad” was circled three times over.

No, they weren’t cataloging my life. They were creating it.

It was only when I turned my attention back to the people that I finally noticed. I recognized them. Not just some of them. All of them. They were all people I knew from work, from my personal life, and so on. I even recognized the dude-bro college kid from the rest stop, although I realized he was much older than I had initially thought.

Then I saw Paul running around with a clipboard barking orders.

“I don’t care what it takes,” he was shouting. “Keep this under control! We cannot lose containment!”

I saw Carrie, a young-faced woman sitting at one of the computers. Whenever her eyes darted to me, I didn’t see any familiarity in them, although I may have recognized a trace of pity.

But why? Why were all these people here? What the hell was this?

“It keeps failing,” Carrie was explaining to Paul. “We don’t know why. No matter how far we get into the simulation, it keeps breaking down and we lose control. It’s only luck that we managed to regain stability the last few times.”

Paul slammed his clipboard down on the desk next to them, visibly frustrated.

“Why damn it,” he asked no one in particular. “Why does it keep failing? Why isn’t it working?!”

“You’re wrong. It is working,” a voice said.

And out of the darkness stepped Silas Lavoie, dressed in a sharp black suit. I couldn’t explain why but when he came into view, flanked by two armed guards, my heart jumped. His accent was sill there, but his voice held a trace of coldness I hadn’t expected. He carried himself with an almost tangible air of authority.

“Lavoie, what the hell are you talking about,” Paul asked.

“In fact, the simulation is working too well,” Lavoie said, almost like he was ignoring Paul completely. He stopped forward and squinted at me.

“It thinks it’s human.”

His words were like a shot through my brain. My mind raced, trying to come to terms with what he was saying. And then, from an impossible mental depth, a revelation started to surface. I felt like I could reach out and touch the closure I had been seeking for so long. I felt like I was on the verge of understanding not only who, but what I was.

But it didn’t matter. The window vanished into the gloom and my eyes were forced shut. The deep blue gave way to an impenetrable blackness. I sank into an endless oblivion, my mind going blank…

 

In my dreams, all that awaits is The Ocean.

 

As always, you can like the Rumination on the Lake Facebook page here.

The Journal of Thomas Edmond

A little introduction to this one is probably necessary.  I decided to try my hand at writing a little ghost story for you folks.

Let me know what you think of it in the comments, and if you’d like to see more.

The story begins after the break.

 *   *   *

Day 1

My first impression is that I like it.

It may be a run-down old hotel, but I like it.  It sits near the edge of a massive ocean cliff, with so many of the bedroom windows looking out at the sea.  You can hear the waves crashing on the rocks below at all times of the day.  The breeze rustles through your hair when you stand outside.  It’s peaceful really.

They called it “The Cliffside Inn”.

This is the fourth place I’ve visited, and I’ve gotta say, it’s the most picturesque of the places I’ve been to so far.  Even if my quest to visit the most haunted places in Europe ends up being a bit of a bust, at least I got to see some cool locations.

I’ve set up in one of the rooms on the third floor of the four floor hotel.  This one still has some wallpaper in it, left over from when the hotel was still operating.  The wallpaper is a light, faded floral pattern with roses and violets.  Yeah it’s kind of a girly room but screw it.  This is where I’m making my bed.  I’m secure in my masculinity damn it!

I’ll write a day entry and a night entry for this journal, recording all that I see and hear.  I plan to camp out here for a week.  So hopefully, something interesting will happen.

 

Night 1

It’s about two in the morning right now, and so far nothing.  I don’t even get a vibe from this place.  I spent most of the night looking into the different rooms around the place.  Most of them have nothing in them, but some still have dressers and drawers left over, and some even have bed frames.  People really did a number on the place.  I had heard that looters had basically cleaned the place, taking everything of value.  But I didn’t realize just how much they did.

When I explored the main lobby and reception area, I found some pamphlets about the hotel.  “Come visit The Cliffside Inn, with exquisite vistas and unforgettable service.  You’ll never want to leave!”  Man, advertisers in the early 1900s were just as out of touch as they are today huh?  Despite their cheesiness, it did give me some good background information on the place.  Apparently the owner, Joshua E. Whitcomb, bought this place back in 1901.  It started as a brothel when it was built in the late 1800s, but didn’t last long that way.  It was abandoned for a couple of decades before Whitcomb bought it and renovated it into a hotel.  I’m actually surprised no one thought of that before.

But now the place is abandoned again.  I’ve heard the stories.  Strange inexplicable events, rumors that Whitcomb may have been a wee bit too interested in the occult, ghostly sightings and noises, the works.

The root of it all seems to be this one June night way back in 1938.  The Great Depression was still hitting people hard, and a lot of them came here to forget their worries.  On June 18th, there was this gigantic party.  All of the regulars and some new people showed up and they were all having a great time.  Well, that is until they all disappeared without a trace.  No one even realized something had happened until a family member of one of the guests went looking for them, and found the hotel completely empty.

The detail that always sends a shiver down my spine was the half-eaten dinners and full glasses of beer left behind, like everyone just got up and left suddenly.

No one was ever found, and the police suspected Mr. Whitcomb once they discovered his interest in the occult.  I’ve always wondered if Whitcomb actually had anything to do with it, or if there was something else going on.  I doubt I’ll ever truly know.  The place was picked clean long ago, so anything of note is probably long gone.

Strange…I thought I heard a voice just now.  I’m gonna check the hallways real quick.

Nope nothing.  Just empty hallways.  It was probably the wind.  It’s always the wind.

Well I guess that’s it for tonight then.

 

Day 2

Something I forgot to mention yesterday.  There’s a lighthouse off in the distance.  It sits at the edge of another cliff, looking out over the ocean.  It’s really tall.  I guess that it must be at least three stories in height.  I’ll have to go check it out sometime this week.  Maybe tomorrow.

Anyway I did some more exploring today.  I didn’t find any more useful information about the place, but I did find something weird.

So the reception area is this big room right?  It has a large, faded wood desk in the middle, with an office directly behind it that I assume was for the owner.  There’s also a restaurant and bar at the other end of the room, separated by a set of double doors and stained glass windows.  Well anyways, near the front entrance to the hotel I found a door I hadn’t seen before.  It was this heavy, shiny oak door with a gleaming brass handle.  When I tried the handle, it was locked.  I briefly considered breaking the door down, but that just seemed stupid.  I’ll look around for a key.

The weird thing about it?  I could swear this door wasn’t there before.  I thought I remembered looking there yesterday and seeing nothing.  Who knows, maybe I just missed it or something.  But I got this strange feeling in my stomach when I was close to it.  I felt uneasy, and a little dizzy.  The hair on my arms stood up.  It sounds silly I know, but there’s something about that door that doesn’t sit right with me.  I can’t explain it.  It all felt so much clearer to me in the moment, but now it feels far away, like a distant sound or memory.

In any case, something better happen tonight, or I’m going to be really angry!

 

Night 2

Um, you know how I said something better happen?  I regret that.  I really, REALLY regret that.

So I was just about to fall asleep tonight (it must have been like eleven) when I suddenly heard music off in the distance.  It sounded like an old piano.  Jesus.  I nearly crapped my pants right there.  Look, I’m not a guy who gets scared easy, but when ghost pianos start playing in the middle of the night I tend to freak out a little bit.

Anyway, I sat still listening to it for a couple of minutes.  It was playing some old classical tune of some kind.  It might have been one of those really early Frank Sinatra tunes, I couldn’t really tell.  After listening for a little bit, I grabbed a flashlight from my pack and decided to investigate.

When I entered the hallway, the piano was considerably louder than it was in my room.  I could tell it was coming from somewhere below me.

I raced down the stairs, the sound growing louder and louder as I went.  Once I hit the ground floor and entered the reception area, I could tell it was coming from the bar area.  As I swept my flashlight across the stained glass, I could swear I saw a woman’s shadow.  She was sitting down, hammering her fingers across shadowy keys.  I only caught a glimpse of it, but I think her mouth was moving.  She was silently singing along to the song.  Call it wishful thinking, but she seemed happy.

I walked up to the door and placed my hand on it.  It was then that the piano just stopped abruptly.  It just cut, like someone paused a recording.  When I entered the bar I found nothing.  There was no piano.  There was no music.  Nothing.

I brushed some of the dust off the pictures hanging on the wall, and sure enough, there was a piano in some of them.  At times, there was a young woman with bright red hair sitting at it.  She looked the same size and shape of the shadow, but I couldn’t tell for sure.  She had lovely eyes.  An older woman stood behind her in one of the pictures, smiling.  She looked to be the girl’s mother, or at least a relative of some sort.

The piano was one of those really old, classy grand pianos.  My guess is that one of the looters took it, although I can’t imagine why.  Seems like a lot of work and effort for a freaking piano.  Who knows, maybe they were a budding musician and just didn’t have the money to buy one.

The pictures are eerie.  They’re like snapshots in time, echoes of the past.  The people in  them are smiling and happy, blissfully unaware that anything bad will happen to them.  As I ran my eyes across them I couldn’t help but ask where?  Where did these people go?  How did they just disappear with no trace?

I have a theory.  If Whitcomb really did murder these people, he probably tossed the bodies over the cliff.  The rocks at the bottom surely tore the bodies apart, and the ocean current carried what was left out to sea.  But I have my doubts about the Whitcomb murder theory.  I see a man in these pictures that looks like he could be Whitcomb.  He has bright blue eyes and slick brown hair.  He’s wearing an old fashioned tweed suit and smiling, standing next to the piano as the young redheaded lady.  He seems happy.  Call it a gut feeling, but I don’t fully believe that he just up and killed everyone.  But who knows, maybe I’m wrong.

In any case, I’m sitting on one of the bar stools right now, wondering what to do next.  I admit, the experience rattled me.  But secretly, I’m all pumped up inside.

Finally, some excitement!

 

Day 3

I found a safe!  But I don’t know how to open it yet.

It was behind a painting in one of the old rooms.  From what I could tell, this was Whitcomb’s room at some point.  I found some books on the desk that talked about the occult, so that’s the assumption I’m making.  It’s odd, certain parts of this hotel are incredibly well-preserved.

Anyway, the safe has a strange mechanism.  It has a little ball that you move along a track.  It can go up, down, left and right, and I’m guessing that when you move it in a certain pattern, it’ll unlock the safe.  The track looks a lot like a cross, which would seem to imply some religious symbolism to the safe.  I have a hint on how to solve it.  When I opened one of the occult books on the desk, a slip of paper fell out.

It read “if I ever forget the combination to the safe, I can remember one word: Trinity.  – J.W.”

I thought about what it could mean for several minutes, but decided to return to it later.

I passed by that door again in the reception area, the one that I assume leads into the cellar.  I don’t know why it bothers me so.  It just looks like an ordinary door but something deep inside tells me that it’s not at all what it seems.  I feel almost nauseous whenever I see it.

So I’m sitting at the bar again (hit me barkeep), looking at all the old pictures.  It seems that at some point this place was always lively and fun.  They may be grainy old photos, but they’re still in color.  Everyone seems to be having a good time.  I wonder if they were having a good time on that summer night all those years ago.  I wonder if they even saw it coming.

 

Night 3

So first it was the ghostly piano, now the ghostly foghorn.  As I went upstairs to write this entry, an ear-splitting horn sounded from far off.  When I looked out of the window, I saw the lighthouse’s beam swinging through the night.  The glaring beam blinded me as it swung past.

Here’s the thing.  That lighthouse hasn’t been operational since around the 1960s, and I’m pretty sure no one has been in the thing for some years.  I remember hearing that there were plans to turn the lighthouses around here into historical landmarks and museums, but it never happened.

Wait.  Now I’m hearing knocking.  It’s really far off, but I can definitely tell it’s knocking.  Is someone else here?  I have to go check this out.

 

Well that was a bust.  I followed the sound as best as I could, but it kept changing locations.  At first it sounded like it was just down the hall, but when I thought I got close to where it was coming from, it changed.  It was now below me, so I went downstairs.  But it went further below me again.  So I made my way to the reception lobby.  And again, it was below me.

It was coming from whatever lies below the hotel.  I swept my flashlight over in that corner, and there it was, that damn door.  It seemed to sneer at me, tempting me to open it.  I almost walked toward it, but I fought the urge.  I walked slowly back upstairs like a total badass.  I didn’t care.  I wasn’t scared at all.

Okay, I lightly jogged up the stairs.

Fine, I ran up the stairs like a little girl.  What do you want from me?

Things are starting to get really weird around here.  Well I’m signing off for the night.  Hopefully tomorrow brings some clarity.

 

The darkness is alive

The darkness is alive

The darkness is alive

The darkness is alive

The darkness is alive.

 

Day 4

Okay, what the hell is going on?  I woke up this morning to find my journal spread open on a nearby desk.  Below my journal entry from the night before, someone had scribbled “the darkness is alive” in some kind of scrawling handwriting with big letters.

The strange thing is that it isn’t my handwriting.  I can tell as much.  It has some similarities to mine, but there’s a distinctive curve to it, especially around the letter “i”.  So is someone else here, messing with me?  Or is it something else?  I have no idea.

In any case, I’m headed out this morning to check out that lighthouse.  The light and the foghorn last night have me all curious about it.

 

The damn thing is padlocked shut.  I’m standing on the cliff near the lighthouse right now writing this.  There’s no way I’m getting in there, and there’s nothing in there that would make me try.  Here’s the curious thing.  I knew the hotel was supposedly haunted, but I heard nothing about the lighthouse.  Could it be possible that they’re symptoms of the same phenomenon?  I’ve never heard of such a thing, but then again, I’ve never actually SEEN a real haunting.  This place, this entire area is getting under my skin.  I’m gonna start heading back to the hotel.  It took me about an hour’s walk or so to get here, so it’ll be a fair trek back.

 

Eureka!  I did it!  I opened the safe!

On my walk back, I had a moment of inspiration.  The word “trinity” could be referring to the holy trinity.  You know, father, son, holy ghost and all that.  And when do religious people usually invoke the holy trinity?  When they cross themselves right?  So I replicated the motion (up  to down, and then left to right in one smooth motion), and POP went the safe.  Let’s check out what’s inside.

This is weird.  The only thing that’s in here is an old diary.  It looks like it belonged to Whitcomb.

Weirder still, most of the pages seem to be blank.  All except one.

I’m feeling some serious chills right now.  It’s the entry from the night everyone disappeared.  I’ll transcribe it in my journal.

 

June 18th, 1938

It’s all set.  I’m going to try to open that door tonight, the door that shouldn’t be there.  It’s been an oddity since it first appeared some months back.  I know we’ve never built a cellar, nor do the plans for the building ever reference such an addition.  I talked to Betty about it, and she’s never seen it before either.  We’ve lied to our guests about it, telling them that we made the addition during the winter when we closed for renovations.  Thank god for that.

The door is a strange thing, immaculate and shiny.  No matter how much time passes, it never loses its luster.  The brass handle shines just as spectacularly as it did when I first noticed the door.  I put my ears up to it some time back.  I could hear and feel something coming up from below, some kind of thumping.  Like a heartbeat.  I could feel something else in it, something evil.

I plan on getting to the bottom of this tonight.  I procured a crowbar, and hopefully while everyone is still partying in the bar I’ll be able to pry open the door without interruption.  If someone asks, I’ll just say I lost the keys.

Eight o’clock tonight.  That’s when I will attempt to open it.

 

Oh god help me…what have I done.  What did I unleash?  When I emerged from that endless dark abyss, I found no one in the bar.  It was all so deathly quiet.  I ran through the hotel screaming for anyone.  But no one else was here.  Except…that thing.  I can still feel it now, leering at me from the darkness.  I don’t know what it is.  But it wants to claim me, just like I assume it did everyone else.

The front door is gone.  It disappeared.  I’m trapped here now.

I made my way back to my room.  I’m sitting here now trying to figure out what to do.  The bottom floor is totally encased in darkness now, darkness so thick I can’t even see the bottom steps.  I know that if I go down there I’m gone, sent wherever it sent all the others.  What do I do?  I can’t escape.  Everything outside the windows is black.  There are no stars, no light, nothing.  There’s only one thing I can try.  I’m going to see if I can find another way back into that door.  Maybe I can seal it from the other side, and end this.  I wish I could see my wife and child one last time.  By the time they return, I’ll be long gone.

 

The devil sleeps in the rocks

The devil sleeps in the rocks

I’m so sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry

 

This journal, no one fakes something like this.  Those last few lines, they were written by a man in the throes of true terror.  Either what he said actually happened, or he went crazy enough to believe it.  Either way, I’m done with this.  I’m not spending another damn night here.  The sun is setting, but I’m gone.  I’m packing my stuff and getting out.  I’ll be damned if I’m gonna die here.

 

Night 4

Well I’m damned.  The front door is gone.

I packed up my supplies and headed toward the front door, only to find that the front door didn’t exist anymore.  I ran around the entire hotel, looking for another exit, but there is none.  I tried the windows, but all is blackness outside.  Oh god why didn’t I leave earlier?  Why didn’t I leave after the second night with that damn piano?  I’m such an idiot.

I’m sitting in the reception area right now, trying to figure out what to do.  In a last ditch effort I brought Whitcomb’s occult books down with me, trying to find something, anything to help me out here.  But it’s all useless.  There’s nothing in here that’s remotely similar to what I’m experiencing.  I’m trapped here, just like they were.  Am I going to be consumed next?

Wait a second…this book is signed to Joshua Edmond Whitcomb.  Edmond?  Could it be?

Was Joshua Whitcomb my grandfather?

My parents never really spoke about my grandfather, and I never met him as a child.  I didn’t even really know anything about him, and whenever I asked, they dodged the question.  Was this why?  Because they believed the stories about him?  That he murdered all those people and then just vanished?

The only thing my mother ever said about him was that “hopefully he’s dead now.”

Was this fate?  Was I meant to come here?  I mean, what are the odds that I would show up at this place, looking for a thrill, and find traces of my long lost grandfather?

Oh no, The door is open.  I heard a creak just a second ago, and when I looked up, the damn door was OPEN.  I can hear something coming from below, a pulse, a thumping.  Is that…a heartbeat?  Is this what Whitcomb described when he put his ears to the door all those years ago?

It beckons.  It calls.  It wants me to go down there.  I don’t think I can resist.

I’m going.  I don’t care what happens to me.  I have to know.  If I’m going to die here, I might as well know why.

 

The cellar, the cellar is NOT a cellar.  I don’t know what it is.  Something far more ancient.  The darkness down there is impenetrable.  The light from the stairwell won’t reach beyond the stairs.  It just stops, like there’s a barrier there.  I reached out, and I could feel cold stone walls.  I heard a distant wailing noise, the shrieks of the suffering.  The heartbeat, or whatever it is, was much stronger down there.  It thumped in my ears, causing my head to pound.  It felt like my head kept pulsing, getting bigger and smaller with each passing thump.  I felt dizzy, like I was going to faint.  I still couldn’t see anything.

I kept hearing different voices, crying out for release.  They weren’t aware of me I think.  They just kept crying and crying and crying.  It was about to drive me insane.

And then, I heard it.  A deep, gravely voice from right next to me.

It said my name.  IT KNEW MY NAME.

And the laughter, oh god the laughter.

I ran.  I ran as fast as I could to escape.  I bounded up the stairs and slammed the door shut behind me.  It won’t help.  I know it won’t help.

“The devil sleeps in the rocks”.  My grandfather was right.  Something is down there, something evil.  And it wants me.

 

I can see it now, the darkness, it spreads out from behind the door.  The door itself is gone, swallowed by the blackness.  The heartbeat is getting louder now.  I can feel it looking at me, grinning wide, ready to devour my soul.  I’m heading for the attic, maybe I can hold out there until this passes.  It’s my only chance.

 

I’ve been in the attic for about half an hour now, and there’s no sign of the thing.  But I can’t be sure that it’s gone.  I’ll stay here for a while longer before I venture out.

 

It’s getting darker now, so dark.  I can barely see the far wall anymore.

 

I HEAR IT.  It’s right below me now, the pounding heartbeat.  The pulse of pure evil.

 

It’s coming up through the trapdoor.

 

It’s saying my name.  It knows me.  It wants me.

If anyone is reading this, RUN.  Just get out of here before it knows you’re here.  Run as fast as you can, and don’t look back.

 

It’s here, IT’S HERE.  I can see it seeping through the trapdoor.

 

There’s something there, in the darkness.  I can almost see it…

 

Oh god they’re faces.  I see FACES.  They’re begging me, pleading with me.  They want help.  But there’s nothing I can do.

 

Someone is screaming at me from the darkness.  Someone strangely familiar.

 

…Dad?

 

The devil sleeps in the rocks

The devil sleeps in the rocks

The devil sleeps in the rocks

The devil sleeps in the rocks

 

The devil sleeps…no more…

 

*   *   *

I hope you enjoyed the story.  I know I enjoyed writing it.  Being a long time horror fan, I found it odd that I hadn’t ever really written anything like this before.  The stuff I tend to write is mainly science fiction with maybe a little tinge of horror in it.

Well let me know what you think about it in the comments below.  Let me know if you want to see more.  I have some ideas on how to expand of the tale of The Cliffside Inn, or I could do something else altogether.  Share your thoughts in the comments.

In any case, that’s all I have for this week.  Tune in next Wednesday for another post.  Until then, have a great week everyone!