So I bumped into this short film called “Modern Educayshun” recently (see it’s funny because they spelled it all stupid like). It was created by Neel Kolhatkar, an Australian comedian. On his Youtube channel, Kolhatkar lists the video under a playlist called “Short Films and Cultural Satire”.
Let’s take a look at it, shall we?
The short film opens on a spooky hallway filled with spooky music (with stock spooky noises too). Before our hero (played by Neel himself) manages to enter any of the classrooms someone screams, causing him to stop in his tracks for a moment.
Our hero enters in a math classroom that inexplicably has only four students (including him) in it. The lesson begins with a simple question:
“What’s one plus one?”
The protagonist slowly raises his hand and answers “two”. But the teacher says no, he’s incorrect. Mr. Turtleneck then raises his hand and gives us our true answer:
Time for another question, “what’s three times three?” The protagonist raises his hand again, answering “nine”. But of course he’s wrong, because the real answer is “gender equality”. At this point the hero of the story asks “is this a joke?”, to which the girl student (Penelope) replies “you think gender equality is a joke?”
Our hero responds “no…but isn’t this a math class?”
“Don’t be so racist,” exclaims Mr. Turtleneck.
Do you see the trend now? I’m sure you do. This is one of those videos…you know, the ones that people share all the time to assure themselves that they’re right and everyone who thinks differently is wrong. That’s actually how I stumbled into the video in the first place, because a couple conservative people on my friends list shared it. I have to admit that the first time I saw the video, I clicked away right after the gender equality line because it became clear to me what the video was doing. But for the sake of this blog post, I dove back in and watched the whole thing.
And it doesn’t get better. No…it just gets worse.
The story continues with the students taking out their research projects. Mr. Turtleneck and Penelope are given six out of ten on their projects. Sunshine (the student wearing suspenders) is given a one. Then, she gets to our hero, who gives an eloquent explanation of using math to predict heart attacks. She gives him a seven, to which he responds “you barely even read it.”
“You used red pen,” she says.
“Red is considered offensive in many religions,” Mr. Turtleneck helpfully adds.
Now, it would seem that our hero earned the highest score in the class, but then the teacher averages out all their scores. In the end, everyone ends up with a five out of ten.
It’s not over yet though. Then they have to add in “privilege points” (at which point I rolled my eyes so hard I saw the inside of my skull). According to the logic of this universe, privilege points are awards or detriments based on your traits. For example, you get minus points for being white and male but you get plus points for being bisexual and female. Once everything is said and done, the protagonist ends up with a five instead of a seven.
And then we get to Sunshine.
“I’m gay, I’m trans, I’m Asian,” he begins. “I’m overweight, I’m lower-class, I’m unintelligent, unattractive…I’ve got hairs on my nipples. And I also got body odor. And I can’t really run properly or tie my shoelaces by myself.” He pauses. “And I once watched a pigeon die.”
After adding all his privilege points together, the teacher gives Sunshine an eighteen out of ten on his project (because maths).
This is when everything hits the fan.
“Let me see this,” our hero proclaims as he stands up. He goes and forcefully grabs Sunshine’s “research project”, revealing to be little more than the word equality written on a piece of paper with hearts drawn around it.
At this point, our hero is fed with everything. “This is wrong,” he says. “You’re all crazy.” And that’s the last straw.
The three other students and the teacher all get up from their desks and advance on him.
“Prepare to die and know that social justice won,” declares Penelope as our hero is backed into a wall. The teacher approaches with a roll of black tape and they start taping his mouth shut. But before they can finish, he screams.
We’re then treated to another shot of the hallway, where a new student hears the scream and jumps. She then enters the very same classroom, starting the cycle all over again…
Now, it’s fairly obvious what the point of this video is. It’s an exaggerated parody of political correctness. And I’ll be honest, I didn’t actually hate the video as much as I thought I would. There are people like Penelope and Mr. Turtleneck in the world, people who are so obsessed with being politically correct that it dominates all aspects of their lives.
And I despise that kind of hypersensitivity myself. It’s the kind of thing where you’re not allowed to criticize Black Lives Matter without fear of immediately being called racist. While I agree with their message, I sometimes disagree with their methods and actions.
But I digress. That’s a story for another time.
Merriam-Webster defines politically correct as “conforming to a belief that language and practices which could offend political sensibilities (as in matters of sex or race) should be eliminated.” So by this definition, political correctness can span a whole heap of subjects.
Which brings me to my issue with this particular video: it’s a very one-sided look at the topic, focusing only on what extremist liberals use as talking points. And that’s exactly why some people are going to share it, so that they can point and say “ha ha ha this is such a perfect representation of liberals ha ha ha man they’re stupid ha ha ha!”
For all pandering the anti-political correctness crowd does, they certainly seem to have their own issues they get all “triggered” about.
For example, what about welfare?
What about burning the American flag?
What about gun control?
Hell, what about abortion? Now there’s a topic both liberals and conservatives are liable to lose their damn minds over.
This is what happens when you reduce a viewpoint down to a few talking points. You lose perspective. And it’s far too easy to feel contempt for anyone who disagrees with you when you don’t take the time to hear them out. That’s basically all this video seems to be, a knee-jerk reaction to the extreme-left of the political spectrum. And while schools do tend to be more liberal, I’ve never seen any real evidence of them being all that stifling to different opinions. In fact, I can only remember one teacher I’ve ever had who openly displayed her political views, and she was arguing against the existence of global warming. For all its attempts at being witty and clever (I will admit I did chuckle at the “sexually ambiguous” line), this video seems to boil down to seven minutes of liberal bashing.
I’m just gonna end this by saying that a best friend of mine from high school was once sent to the principal’s office for not saying the pledge of allegiance.
Because people were “concerned”.
So yeah…it goes both ways.
Thanks for reading! Check back next Wednesday for another post, and as always, have a wonderful week!